Murdertown/Transcript
Ivywood, a town of hot-shots and low-down punks... (Frank and the background appear in black-and-white.) Frank Knight (wearing a trench coat, grinning): "On an empty street stands a cop. The best Goddamn cop in town." Frank (smoking a cigarette): ''"With a loaded six-hooter and a slug of bourbon. He is just one man up against the night's creeps and hoodlums. He is Frank Knight in..." '"MURDERTOWN"' '''Starring Frank Knight' Frank (winking): ''"Join the greatest detective of all time in another-" ''(Chief Marquez appears in color. Once she is done speaking, Frank and the background changes to color too.) Chief Marquez: ''Frank! What's all this nonsense about?! ''Chief Marquez (hands on her hips, enraged): ''Frank! What's all this nonsense about?! ''Frank (in normal clothes, sweating): ''Uh... what? Nothing, Andrea. I watched an old detective movie last night and I was just... ''Chief Marquez: Daydreaming?! If you spent half as much time on your police work, we'd have no crime in this city! Anyway, <Rank> , a note was just delivered for you. Frank (reading the note): ''"Dear . You're the only one I can trust. Come to the set of "Murder by Moonlight" at once! Someone wants me dead!" and it's signed by a Lindsay Bannister. ''Chief Marquez (scratching her head): ''Lindsay Bannister? I've heard of her. But I don't know why she would ask you to go on a film set, she's not an actress. She's some drunk heiress. Who could want her dead?! ''Frank (happily): ''A drunken socialite in need of help?! That's my kind of mystery! ''Frank (pumping his fist): ''And , I've just thought of a brilliant way we can sneak onto that film set! Let's go! 'Later, at the film studio...' ''Frank (wearing a trench coat, fantasizing): ''This is the perfect disguise! Watching detective movies when I was a kid is what made me wanna be a cop. Do you think this hat suits me? ''Frank (nervously): ''Sorry, . We're here to help out a dame in distress, I'll focus now! ''Frank (winking): ''Good thinking, I'll watch for security, you go look for this Lindsay Bannister on the film set! Chapter 1 'Investigate Movie Set.' ''Frank Knight (shocked): ''That... That ain't no dummy?! Oh jeez, , our dame's been bumped off! Lindsay Bannister's been stabbed through the heart! ''Frank (nervously): ''I guess that's what you get for setting up mysterious rendezvous on a detective movie set... You die like in a detective movie! ''Frank (smoking a cigarette): ''At least this costume is going to come in handy after all. We've got a classic murder mystery to solve! ''Frank (puts cigarette away): ''And talking about a mystery, you're right, it seems she's missing a shoe and a glove...... But for now let's focus on what you DID find. ''Frank (winking): ''What you gonna do with that ripped up piece of paper? Make confetti or put it back together? ''Frank (grinning): ''That's a classy cigarette case. You think there's a message scratched on it? Well, okay, I was going to keep it, but I guess you could dust it! ''Frank (confused): ''But what is that thing? It's covered in numbers and letters, like an antique puzzle. Mind if I smash it open? ''Frank: ''No smashing? Oh fine. Be boring, , and just unlock it. 'Examine Puzzle Box.' ''Frank (winking): ''Swell job, , working out the combination for that puzzle box you found on the film set! ''Frank: ''There's a message inside... "Cockerel, bamboo, white and red. You'll all be sorry now Lindsay's dead". ''Frank: ''"Now Lindsay's dead"? I'm no great shakes at riddles, but this one mentions our victim! ''Frank (pumping his fist): ''Good thinking, let's get it to Russell. He's weird enough to crack this riddle! 'Analyze Riddle.' ''Russell (excitedly): ''"Cockerel, bamboo, white and red. You'll all be sorry now Lindsay's dead". This poetic riddle you brought me is brilliant, . It's clearly been written by Lindsay's killer! ''Frank: ''So we're looking for a poet?! ''Russell (grinning): ''Not so easy. Anyone could write in this style. I'll try something just off the top of my head... ''Russell: ''"So Frank is a moron, we know this is true. It's always who unravels each clue." ''Frank: ''Cut the crap, wise guy. What can you tell us about the killer? ''Russell (biting his glasses): ''The beginning of this riddle sounds familiar. "Cockerel, bamboo, white and red"... ''Russell (puts away glasses, excitedly): ''Those are names for mahjong tiles. You know mahjong, ? It's a Chinese puzzle game. ''Frank (grinning): ''I think I know it... It's like dominoes, only with little pictures? ''Russell (winking): ''Exactly! , there's no doubt about it. You're looking for a killer who plays mahjong! 'Examine Cigarette Case.' ''Frank (smoking a cigarette): ''That cigarette case you found on the film set sure cleaned up nicely. Ever thought about becoming a butler, ? ''Frank (puts cigarette away, amused): ''Oh okay, I'll stop fooling. Anyway, what does the message you found say? "To Dick Shakespeare, we'll always have Ivywood." And it's signed by Lindsay, our victim! ''Frank (shocked): ''Dick Shakespeare?! THE Dick Shakespeare! You know who he is, right, ? ''Frank (excitedly): ''He's only the greatest actor of all time! His detective films are my favorite! ''Frank (fantasizing): ''If the victim gave him this cigarette case as a gift, we need to ask him why! ... Is it corny to ask for an autograph? 'Ask Dick Shakespeare about his relationship with the victim.' ''Dick (smoking a cigarette, tiredly): ''Look, I woke up an hour ago with my face banged up and stinking of booze, . What's this about? ''Frank (excitedly): ''Sir, may I just start by saying it's a pleasure to meet you? I'm a big fan of your detective movies an- ''Frank (nervously): ''Right, sorry about that, . Sir, we're here because Lindsay Bannister has been murdered. ''Dick (shocked): ''What?! And I'm a suspect? I barely knew the kid! ''Frank: ''Were you working on the "Murder by Moonlight" movie? That's where Lindsay was found dead. ''Dick: ''No, I didn't get a role in that movie... Look, I met Lindsay a month ago at the tail end of tinseltown. Two drunks in an Ivywood bar. Is there a sadder sight? ''Dick (holding his cigarette): ''Next thing I know it's morning. We're in bed together with hangovers that could fill Rhine Canyon. ''Dick (puts cigarette away): ''I told her: "Girl, I'm old enough to be your grandfather, go find yourself a younger failure to ruin your life with." I didn't see her again. 'Examine Torn Note.' ''Frank (pumping his fist): ''Nice job! So that ripped up paper you found on the crime scene is a message addressed to our victim! ''Frank: ''Look, it says "Please leave our hotel". So it's an eviction notice. Our victim was getting herself thrown out of the hotel?! ''Frank (winking): ''Good point, it still means she was staying there! The paper shows the logo of the Ivywood Heights Hotel! Let's go check it out. 'Investigate Hotel Lobby.' ''Frank (smoking a cigarette): ''Can you say fancy, ? Yep, this hotel is where the cats got the cream and made butter! ''Frank (puts cigarette away): ''That luggage you found looks suspicious. What do the letters "L.B." stand for? Lazy Bozo? ''Frank (amused): ''Ah... right, . "L.B." must stand for Lindsay Bannister. Let's look inside! ''Frank (confused): ''But why did you pick up that perfume bottle? Do I smell?! ''Frank (pumping his fist): ''There's a message attached to it?! I'll fetch your dusting kit! 'Examine Faded Note.' ''Frank (pointing his finger, excitedly): ''Whoa, , you were right about there being a message on that perfume bottle you found at the hotel. ''Frank: ''"Velma, you stink!" And it's signed by our victim! ''Frank: ''But who is this Velma? You're right, maybe Hannah can find her in the database! 'Analyze Victim's Message.' ''Hannah (nauseated): ''Ugh! , next time you bring me perfume, warn me! My whole office smells like a beauty pageant! ''Hannah: ''You're lucky I could still work out who the "Velma" in this message is. It's the victim's step-mother. ''Frank (amused): ''Ha! Now I understand the message "you stink"! I bet she is some kind of old hag step-mother, like in fairy tales! ''Hannah (amused): ''You couldn't be more wrong! Velma Bannister is a famous Ivywood bombshell! And she's practically the same age as the victim! ''Hannah: ''Having a step-mom barely older than her must have been weird for Lindsay. But , when you talk to Velma, make sure Frank doesn't drool! 'Ask Velma Bannister about her relationship with her step-daughter.' ''Velma (holding her cigarette-holder): ''You can come closer officers, I don't bite... hard. ''Frank (sweating): ''It's about... er... your step-daughter. She's... been murdered. ''Velma (grinning): ''Yes, I heard about that. That girl had a death wish. Looks like it was granted. ''Frank (fantasizing): ''Lindsay was killed on the "Murder by Moonlight" movie set, and you're an actress. Did she come to see you? ''Velma: ''No, I'm not in that movie. And Lindsay didn't like me very much, probably because we're practically the same age. She couldn't handle it, poor little thing. Pretended I didn't exist. ''Frank (shocked): ''It must have hurt your feelings! ''Velma: ''I gave up feelings when I took up smoking. ''Frank (blushing): ''Well... ma'am... I think we have everything we need. ''Velma (blowing a kiss): ''Well, if you need anything else from me, just whistle. You know how to whistle don't you? You just put your lips together... and blow. '(After talking to Velma Bannister)' ''Frank (in love): ''Is there a train nearby, ? Or is that my heart beating? That dame's got me dizzy. If looks could kill, she's certainly the murderer. 'Examine Victim's Luggage.' ''Frank (pumping his fist): ''You found an envelope stuffed with cash in our victim's luggage? My dreams just came true, ! ''Frank: ''Yes. I know it's a clue and we can't take the money. But look what's written on the envelope! "Thanks for everything", and it's signed by Lindsay! ''Frank: ''Did Lindsay draw a sketch of the recipient too?! Looks like this money was for some guy with a bow-tie and a mustache! ''Frank (winking): ''There's a challenge, ! Can you find who this drawing represents by browsing our database? Go impress me! 'Examine Sketch.' ''Frank (impressed): ''Well I'll be... ! You actually managed to find who this drawing represents! A guy named Walter Fellows. ''Frank: ''Why would our victim give cash to this guy? The file says he's a bartender at the Ivywood Heights Hotel... ''Frank (pumping his fist): ''A bartender? Must be my lucky night! Let's go talk to Walter right now, ! 'Ask Walter Fellows why the victim was giving him money.' ''Frank (grinning): ''So, Walter, why don't you tell how you know Lindsay Bannister? And why she was sending you all this cash? ''Walter (smoking a cigarette and holding a shaker, happily): ''Oh, that'll be Little Lindsay's bar bill! She spends more on booze here than all my other customers combined! ''Frank (nervously): ''I'm sorry to tell you this, but you've just lost one customer. Lindsay's been murdered. ''Walter (puts down shaker, shocked): ''Little Lindsay... dead? No... that poor sweet girl! She was like a daughter to me. She used to sit at my bar and tell me her troubles. ''Frank: ''Sweet girl? We heard she was some wild drunken socialite! ''Walter (crying): ''I knew the real Lindsay. She had a smile that could light the darkness of bars... 'Autopsy Victim's Body.' ''Roxie: ''Poor Lindsay. I saw her in a bar once, you know. She drank a whole bottle of bourbon and got thrown out by the bouncers... My hero. ''Roxie (fantasizing): ''Looks like she kept partying till the end though. I'm sure you noticed, , but one of her shoes and gloves are missing! ''Frank: ''Yeah, we'd spotted that. We'll need to keep all eyes open for those missing items! ''Roxie (excitedly): ''What wasn't missing was the murder weapon. This antique dagger was pushed into her chest quickly and efficiently. It got her right in the heart! ''Roxie: ''I had a close look at the dagger, there was one substance on it that I couldn't find a trace of on Lindsay. ''Roxie (laughing): ''Do you know what lime, gin, and a hint of syrup makes, ? ''Frank (grinning): ''A pretty wild party? ''Roxie (excitedly): ''A gimlet! It's a cocktail. Before stabbing your victim, the killer drank a gimlet! 'Later, at the station...' ''Frank: ''Well, , this case has more angles than a crooked math professor. How we gonna solve it?! ''Frank (shocked): ''We've got a murdered socialite who drank so much, she held more liquid than the Hoover Dam! ''Frank (grinning): ''But Walter Fellows loved her. It takes a lot to make a barman cry, believe me, I've pretty much got a doctorate in bartender psychology! ''Frank (in love): ''And as for Velma, our victim's step-mother... How could a looker like that do anything wrong?! ''Frank: ''Anyway, there's one crucial question we still haven't answered. Why did Lindsay want to meet us on the set of "Murder by Moonlight"... and how did the killer find her there?! ''(Frank's phone rings) Frank: ''Wait. Who would ring in the middle of the night? ''Frank (on the phone): ''Hello? ''Anonymous Caller: '' , you're way off base. I know who killed Lindsay Bannister. Chapter 2 ''(Frank's phone rings) Frank Knight: ''Sorry, , my phone's ringing. Who could call us in the middle of the night? ''Frank (on the phone): ''Hello? ''Anonymous Caller: '' , you're way off base. I know who killed Lindsay Bannister on the film set. ''Frank (shouting): ''Who is this?! Are you telling us you know who killed our victim?! ''Anonymous Caller: ''You'll find all the answers you need on the boardwalk. ''(Anonymous Caller hangs up) Frank (shocked): ''Wait! Who are you?! Don't go!... ''Frank (hangs up): ''They've hung up!... Anonymous phone calls in the middle of our investigation into a socialite's murder? I don't like this! ''Frank: '', do you think we should follow this lead? Where is the boardwalk anyway?! ''Frank (pumping his fist): ''Wait. I remember that place! The Ivywood Boardwalk? I used to go there as a kid. I'd daydream about this girl called- ''Frank (amused): ''I guess you don't want to know about that. ''Frank (pointing his finger, excitedly): ''Anyway, whoever that person was, this is the lead of a lifetime! Let's check out the boardwalk! 'Investigate Boardwalk.' ''Frank: ''That anonymous caller said we'd find all the answers here on the boardwalk... well, where are they? ''Frank: ''You think some torn up paper will tell us anything? Seriously, ? Fine, I'll get you some tape to piece it together. ''Frank: ''This is no time to play games, ! If you want to search that claw grab game, you're on your own! ''Frank (grinning): ''That glove looks familiar... did I buy it for some dame once? ''Frank (shocked): ''Oh you're right! Lindsay was missing a glove... and the one she had on looked just like this! ''Frank (pumping his fist): ''This is the victim's glove! Okay buster, let's see what you can collect from it! 'Examine Claw Crane Game.' ''Frank: ''Great, ! You found... something in that claw crane game... what is that? ''Frank: ''Oh, it's a scabbard. A sort of sheath for holding a sword or dagger... ''Frank (shocked): ''Holy smoke, you're right! This is the murder weapon's sheath! Let's get it to the lab! 'Analyze Dagger Scabbard.' ''Hannah (puzzled): ''So , you're saying you found this scabbard for our murder weapon in a claw grab game on the boardwalk?! ''Frank: ''Yeah, not much of a prize, is it?! ''Hannah (surprised): ''Actually, together with its dagger, it's worth over a million dollars! I'd call that an excellent prize! ''Frank (shocked): ''What! Seriously? found a piece of junk worth a cool mill?! ''Hannah (grinning): ''The dagger's an ancient treasure of some European royal family. But it went missing during the war. ''Hannah: ''I contacted a friend who knows all about the antiques trade. She said some shady character turned up and tried to sell the dagger a while back. ''Hannah: ''His name's Rico Damascus. He called himself a European Count and says the dagger is his! ''Frank (grinning): ''Okay, , let's go meet some nobility. I'll remember to be polite! 'Ask Rico Damascus about the murder weapon.' ''Rico (with a cat on his shoulder and holding his walking stick, shouting): ''Vhy have you brought me here?! Zis is an outrage! My cat ist sehr upset! ''Frank: ''Give the pussy some cream and answer us, Rico. Recognize this dagger?! ''Rico (shocked): ''My dagger! My precious dagger! Give it back to me at vonce! ''Frank: ''Not on your life. This is a piece of evidence in a murder inquiry. So what did you have against Lindsay Bannister? ''Rico (angrily): ''That little ! That pesky... how do you say in English?... thief! She stole my precious dagger! ''Frank (shocked): ''What?! Lindsay stole the dagger from you?! She stole her own murder weapon?! How? ''Rico (smirking): ''Vell, a few nights ago I was in the hotel bar, playing a lil mahjong... ''Rico (angrily): ''Then that monster arrived, intoxicated! She spilled my drink! I called her a few... bad words. She got angry. ''Rico (shouting): ''Zen, she stole my dagger and ran off! I could have killed her! 'Examine Torn Paper.' ''Frank (pumping his fist): ''Nice work, that torn up paper you found on the boardwalk was a movie poster for "Murder by Moonlight"! That's the movie they were making on the crime scene! ''Frank (shocked): ''Hey that's Dick Shakespeare on that poster! But he said he wasn't working on that movie! ''Frank: ''To think I looked up to him... Yes, , let's go talk to that rattlesnake. 'Confront Dick Shakespeare about his connection to the crime scene.' ''Frank: ''So Dick, you been keeping secrets from . We know you were working on the crime scene! Lindsay came to see YOU, didn't she? ''Dick (smoking his cigarette, shocked): ''Hey hey! Cool it, pal! I didn't ask her to come! It's not my fault the girl died there! ''Dick (holding his cigarette): ''Lindsay turned up on the film set with a bottle of gin and some limes. A dame and a drink. Who could say no? ''Dick (puts cigarette away): ''We made gimlets and she kept confessing her love for me! Let's say I drank one too many, Lindsay kept refilling my glass. Like she wanted me drunk! ''Dick (smoking his cigarette, sadly): ''Then I blacked out. Last thing I remember was Lindsay's face, she looked so sad. ''Dick (shocked): ''When I came to, my nose was all busted up. Then I saw Lindsay. Dead up against that car. ''Dick (holding his cigarette): ''I was so shocked I ran out of the building. I didn't kill her. But apparently I was there when she was murdered. ''Dick (smoking his cigarette, sadly): ''You think I'd admit I was too drunk to stop her murder? Besides, who'd believe an old drunk like me... 'Examine Glove.' ''Frank (winking): ''Great job getting that substance off the victim's glove you found on the boardwalk! Let's get it to Yann for analysis! 'Analyze Grey Powder.' ''Yann (excitedly): ''Well, , first thing's first, that substance on the victim's glove was cigarette ash! ''Yann (shocked): ''I age-dated the cigarette ash. It's far too recent to be the victim's, it must have come from the killer! ''Frank: ''That would explain why the killer took the glove away... But why would they discard it on the boardwalk? ''Yann (crossing his arms, winking): ''Killers can be forgetful too, . But we can say they definitely smoke! ''Frank: ''Seriously, "your killer smokes"?! But that's everyone! There's Walter who smokes... ''Frank: ''We've got Dick Shakespeare with his cigarette case... ''Frank (in love): ''Of course, how could I forget, Velma smokes, too. Oh, to be one of those cigarettes getting close to her lips... ''Frank: ''So I guess that means cigarettes aren't going to crack this case until we have more evidence. And where should we look for that, ? ''Frank (grinning): ''That's right, ! Our killer drinks gimlets! We can sure order one at the hotel bar! Let's go back there! 'Investigate Hotel Bar.' ''Frank (sweating, nervously): ''Quick, . Show me the clues you've found. I need something to take my mind off all the booze in this bar! ''Frank: ''You found an ice bucket?! Come on , are you trying to make me think more about booze?! ''Frank (amused): ''Alright, we know the killer did like to drink, you'd probably better look through it and see if there's a clue! ''Frank (shocked): ''Wait! That's Lindsay in that photo! She doesn't look very happy! ''Frank: ''Maybe that customer number on the picture will clear things up... Reckon you can decode it? 'Examine Ice Bucket.' ''Frank (grinning): ''So , you didn't get any booze out of that ice bucket, just this case? ''Frank: ''You're right! It has "LB" written on it. Those are the victim's initials! I wonder what's inside... ''Frank (excitedly): ''Whoa, ! That case had these earrings in them! We're rich! They must be worth a fortune! ''Frank: ''Damn you and your moral compass! We won't keep them then, but what are earrings doing in the hotel bar's ice bucket?! ''Frank (pointing his finger, excitedly): ''Nice thinking! The hotel bartender would know why these earrings were there! Let's go back to see Walter! 'Ask Walter Fellows why the victim's jewels were in his bar.' ''Frank (smoking a cigarette): ''Hey, Walter. We've got a specific order for you. It's called "Mysterious hidden jewels on the rocks"! Heard of it? ''Walter (smoking a cigarette, nervously): ''Erm... what do you mean? ''Frank (puts cigarette away): ''Tell us what Lindsay's jewels were doing in your ice bucket?! ''Walter (tearing up): ''I suppose she's dead now. It won't hurt her feelings. Lindsay gave me those jewels to apologize for smashing my bar. ''Walter: ''One night a few weeks ago I was having a quiet game of mahjong, when Lindsay storms into my bar, completely drunk. ''Walter (shocked): ''She knocked over tables, insulted the customers. She took the gimlet I was drinking right out of my hand and smashed it into the mirror! ''Walter (nervously): ''The next day she came into the bar and offered jewels to cover the damage she caused. I wouldn't take them, but she insisted! ''Walter (crying): ''She was so sweet like that, always so thoughtful. So kind. I'll miss her so much. 'Examine Pictures of Victim.' ''Frank (pumping his fist): ''Way to crack the customer code on those photographs of our victim! Let's get it to Hannah! 'Analyze Customer Code.' ''Hannah: ''It's no wonder Lindsay wasn't smiling in this photograph you found at the hotel bar. That code is from a private detective firm! She was being followed! ''Frank: ''Our victim was being spied on? By whom?! ''Hannah (shocked): ''I hacked the private detective's server and found the person being paid to have Lindsay followed... it was Hubert Bannister, the victim's father! ''Frank (shocked): ''What kind of father spies on his own daughter?! ''Hannah (sadly): ''I know right! What an unhappy family! You'd better go talk to Hubert Bannister, , and find out his intentions! 'Ask Hubert Bannister why he was having his daughter followed.' ''Frank: ''Mr Bannister. Can you please explain why you paid a private detective to follow your daughter? ''Hubert (in a wheelchair, holding a cigar): ''She's my daughter, living in a hotel room using my credit cards! Why shouldn't I know her every move?! ''Hubert (shouting): ''Now at least she won't spend any more of my money! ''Frank (shocked): ''Aren't you even a little bit sad she's dead?! ''Hubert: ''Lindsay was a pretty useless child. Not particularly pretty. Academically inadequate. ''Hubert (angrily): ''And she was clumsier than a lame donkey. She always knocked the gimlets out of my hand before I could drink them! ''Hubert (smoking his cigar): ''And with my beautiful young wife, I can have other daughters. ''Frank (shouting): ''That woman is too good for you! ''Hubert (holding his cigar, grinning): ''Oh, I know. Isn't it wonderful what money can get you? 'Later, at the station...' ''Chief Marquez (hands on her hips): '', finally! Have you seen Frank? I've been looking everywhere for him! ''Chief Marquez (scratching her head): ''Where could he have gone to in the middle of a murder investigation?! ''Roxie (shocked): ''Andrea! I just found this note on Frank's desk! You... you'd better read it. ''Chief Marquez (glancing at the note, angrily): ''Oh. That little, sniveling, pipsqueak of a- ''Roxie (curiously): ''What does the letter say? What's happened?! ''Chief Marquez (puts the note down, shouting): ''Frank happened, that's what! First he was born, that's the first mistake he made! Then he became a cop, that's the second! ''Chief Marquez: ''Listen to this note. "So sorry, Andrea... but I'm in love with Velma... we've eloped together. I'll miss you all"! ''Roxie (excitedly): ''Frank's run off with a suspect?! That's the best gossip ever! Chapter 3 ''Chief Andrea Marquez (reading the note, disgusted): ''I can't believe Frank left! Listen to this note. "So sorry, Andrea... but I'm in love with Velma... we've eloped together. I'll miss you all." ''Roxie (excitedly): ''That's the best gossip ever! So what's this Velma like? Is she beautiful, ? ''Chief Marquez (shouting): ''She's a tramp! And it doesn't matter how pretty she is, she's one of 's chief suspects! ''Chief Marquez (crosses her arms, sadly): ''We don't have time to look for Frank now, I know you're close to catching socialite Lindsay Bannister's killer! ''Chief Marquez (scratching her head): ''I guess it's time to call for reinforcements. Even though you're the best cop in town, you still need a partner! ''Chief Marquez (on the phone): ''Hi, it's Andrea. It's time you came back to work. ''Amy (on the phone): ''You've finally remembered me! I've put my uniform on every morning, waiting for you to call me back into work! ''Chief Marquez (sadly): ''The case is a big one! We've got a dead socialite. She was despised by her father, dumped by her lover and pitied by her only friend, a bartender. ''Amy (nervously): ''Whoa! Sounds big! I hope I can handle it! ''Chief Marquez: ''That's not the half of it! Frank has run off with one of the suspects, the victim's step-mother! ''Amy (shocked): ''What?! I'm on my way! 'A while later...' ''Amy (saluting, happily): ''Right, . I'm ready! I'm so happy to be back. You got me out of group therapy with my mother! ''Amy (holding her notebook): ''I read over your case files. I see you already went to the boardwalk... but with Frank, whose mind was on... other things. Maybe I could be more helpful? ''Amy (pumping her fist): ''So glad you agree, ! Let's go back to the boardwalk! 'Investigate Boardwalk Bench.' ''Amy: ''Jeez, , that fortune teller machine you've found looks creepy! ''Amy: ''You're right! That face... It looks weirdly like our victim! Think that's a coincidence? ''Amy: ''I'm not sure I want to know my fortune today. Let's send it to Hannah, ! ''Amy (puzzled): ''That damaged document looks peculiar. What's that symbol on it? ''Amy (shocked): ''You're saying it's the symbol of the Utopians, a religious cult popular in Ivywood? But why is it on this document? ''Amy: ''You're right, we should investigate anything out of the ordinary. Let's dust this document for any- ''Frank (smoking a cigarette): '''Scuse me, have you got a light... ''Frank (puts cigarette away, sweating): ''Oh, , it's you! Didn't expect you to come back here! ''Amy (shouting): ''Frank! How dare you abandon in the middle of an investigation? You ought to be ashamed! ''Frank (nervously): ''Yeah, I feel dreadful. But , you've got to believe me, I didn't have a choice. When a woman like that wants you, you say yes! ''Frank (in love): ''I've looked my whole life for someone like Velma. She may seem like a conniving femme fatale, but try to get to know her. Here she is now... ''Velma (holding her cigarette, grinning): ''Frank, baby. Did you find a light? My cigarette won't smoke itself. Oh it's you, , still bothering with that murder investigation? ''Frank (sweating): ''Velma, sweetheart, please. These are my friends... ''Velma: ''Oh, Frank. Friends are just enemies you haven't got a handle on yet. Come on, let's go sieve the minibar in my hotel room. ''Frank (excitedly): ''Okay, baby. ''Amy (holding her fist, angrily): ''Just a minute! Frank may be fooled, but isn't! Velma's a prime suspect and she's coming back to the station with us! 'Ask Velma Bannister about her recent behavior.' ''Amy: ''People don't just run away with the policemen investigating them for murder. What's your game, Velma? ''Velma (holding her cigarette): ''Ha! The only game I play, sweetheart, is mahjong. And I'm a champion. ''Velma (in love): ''And Frank is a darling man. I'm very much in love with him. ''Amy (shaking her head): ''Well, I hope you two are very happy together, now Frank's resigned from the police force, you'll have- ''Velma (shouting): ''What?! He resigned? That brain-dead halfwit! Why bother seducing an officer if he can't protect me from ! ''Amy (shocked): ''Are you saying you only seduced Frank to protect yourself from 's investigation?! ''Velma: ''Of course! Why would I leave my rich husband for him?! He can't even mix my gimlets the right way! ''Velma (grinning): ''You've been getting very suspicious of my relationship with Lindsay, and I needed some insurance! But you'll still find I'm innocent, . ''Amy (holding her fist, angrily): ''You're despicable, Velma! But this investigation isn't over and I hear they don't make great gimlets in jail! 'Examine Utopian Document.' ''Amy (shocked): ''"We hereby sentence Lindsay Bannister to death"! , this Utopian document is a death warrant for our victim! ''Amy: ''Could this elaborate letter be a signature?! Can you find out who it belongs to in the database? Whoever wrote this must be caught! 'Examine Elaborate Signature.' ''Amy (shocked): ''The seal on that death warrant belongs to Hubert Bannister. Isn't that the victim's father?! ''Amy (holding her fist, angrily): ''That means Lindsay's father signed a death sentence for his own daughter! What kind of a monster would do that?! ''Amy: ''You're right, Hubert Bannister needs to give us some answers! Let's go get them! 'Ask Hubert Bannister why he sentenced his own daughter to death.' ''Amy (holding her fist, angrily): ''Mr Bannister, needs you to explain why you signed a death warrant for your own daughter! ''Hubert (in a wheelchair, holding a cigar): ''That's no death warrant, it's an official Utopian document of termin- ''Amy (shouting): ''No time for your excuses! Explain at once why you sentenced your daughter to death or has reason to arrest you! ''Hubert (grinning): ''It is not "death" as you heathens mean it. This document, to us Utopians, says that Lindsay is cast from our religion forever! ''Hubert (smoking his cigar): ''This is why I had Lindsay followed, to see if she was abiding by our beliefs and rules. Sadly, she was not. ''Hubert (holding his cigar, angrily): ''I raised Lindsay in my religion, gave her everything. And what had she become? A worthless drunk! ''Hubert (shouting): ''Even after the death sentence, she couldn't behave! She threatened to tell everyone all the Utopians' secrets! ''Hubert: ''Traitor! How did the little Lindsay I taught mahjong as a child become such a monster! ''Amy: ''I don't know. But apples don't usually fall very far from the tree! 'Analyze Fortune Teller.' ''Hannah: ''So nice having you back, Amy! After what happened with your brother, I wa- ''Amy: ''Later, Hannah! We're getting close to catching a brutal murderer! So what was in the fortune teller? ''Hannah (blushing, nervously): ''Oh... okay. The fortune teller is just a standard model, but someone customized it to look like the victim. And when I turn it on... ''Fortune Teller: ''"A clue for as hot as fire. The man from afar is an absolute liar!" ''Hannah: ''Cool isn't it?! Someone left you a message, ! ''Amy (shocked): ''That's crazy! Is someone trying to help us... or is it the killer, leading us astray?! ''Hannah: ''I analyzed the message to see if any of your suspects match the description "The man from afar". ''Amy (excitedly): '''s right! Rico Damascus is from "afar"! He's a European Count! ''Hannah: ''Well actually he's not. I found his birth records. He claims to be from Europe, but he was born in Pacific Bay! ''Amy (pumping her fist): ''...which is why the fortune teller says he's an "absolute liar"! Let's go talk to him, ! There's not a moment to lose! 'Find out who Rico Damascus really is.' ''Rico (with a cat on his shoulder and holding a walking stick, shouting): ''Zis is an outrage! I vill call the ambassador! Vhy hav- ''Amy (angrily): ''Cut it out, Rico. knows you're not really from Europe! We checked your birth records... you're from Pacific Bay! ''Rico (shocked): ''Vat! How dare... oh crap. Fine. You got me. I'm a fake! I'm actually from the Bayou. ''Rico: ''Pretending to be a European Count makes selling antiquities easier. Until that Lindsay ruined everything! ''Rico (angrily): ''At one of her father's parties she got me very drunk on these lethal gimlets she was making! ''Rico (shouting): ''While speaking to her, I slipped into my old Bayou accent! If she revealed my secret, my career would be ruined! ''Rico (smirking): ''I gave her that dagger to buy her silence. But I suppose I won't have to worry about that anymore! ''Amy: ''If I were you, Rico, I'd be worrying about 's investigation! Stay where we can find you, we may call you very soon! 'Later, at the station...' ''Amy: '', all I can count in this investigation is one dead body, and a whole lot of suspects! ''Amy (holding her fist, angrily): ''Velma Bannister sure is acting suspicious! She seduced Frank to protect herself from prosecution! ''Amy (disgusted): ''And the victim's father, sentencing his own daughter to death? Even if it's just metaphorical, that family was rotten. And I'm an expert on rotten families, believe me! ''Amy (shaking her head): '', this case has more twists than a corkscrew! And we're running out of time! ''Amy (saluting): ''Good idea, ! When you can't see how it ends, go back to the beginning! Let's check out that film set one more time! 'Investigate Film Equipment.' ''Amy: ''Why is that shoe important, ? ''Amy (excitedly): ''Oh, the victim was missing a shoe? Looks like you found it! Better collect a sample as fast as possible! ''Amy (pumping her fist): ''Good idea! This faded filmstrip may have filmed the murder... but you'll have to clean it up so we can be sure! ''Amy (excitedly): ''I can feel we're getting close, ! It's the last stretch! 'Examine Faded Filmstrip.' ''Amy (pumping her fist): ''That filmstrip's good as new! And it shows our victim! ''Amy (shocked): ''You're right, ! The film shows something aiming a dagger at her heart! It's a recording of Lindsay's murder! ''Amy (holding her fist, angrily): ''The camera must have still been running during Lindsay's murder! If only we had the rest of the reel! ''Amy (saluting): ''You think Hannah could still do something with this?! Hope you're right, because the clock's ticking! 'Analyze Filmed Murder.' ''Hannah (excitedly): '', that filmstrip you found on the crime scene really tested my math muscles! ''Hannah: ''Shadows against the victim's body allowed me to work out an artificial horizon, from where I easily calculated the tangent, hypotenuse and triangulate- ''Amy (angrily): ''Hannah! No time for showing off! Just tell us what you know about the killer! ''Hannah (sweating, nervously): ''Alright! The shadow helped me work out the height of the killer. They're exactly 6 feet tall! ''Amy (pumping her fist): ''Thank you! , we're getting close to catching a 6-foot-tall killer! I know it! 'Examine Victim's Missing Heel.' ''Amy (pumping her fist): ''Great, you've collected a sample from the victim's missing shoe! ''Amy: ''Let's get the substance to Yann for some answers! The killer must know that you're on to them by now! 'Analyze Clear Liquid.' ''Yann (sweating): ''I know you need answers fast and I've been sweating as much as the killer in this lab! ''Yann: ''How do I know the killer was sweating? Because the substance you collected on the victim's shoe was sweat! ''Yann (happily): ''I analyzed the sweat and dug out a few partial strands of DNA, which could only come from someone over 50! ''Amy (pumping her fist): ''Which means the killer is over 50 years old! Ha! Even if they were over 100 years old, we're not letting them get away with this! 'After completing all tasks...' ''Amy (sadly): ''I can't forget that the last time I helped you arrest someone, it was my own brother... ''Amy (saluting): ''But don't worry , I'm not chickening out of this! Let's go and arrest Lindsay's killer! 'Take care of the killer now!' ''Amy (shocked): ''! I can't find Walter Fellows anywhere! But look, I found another riddle! ''Amy (shouting): ''"Did you honestly think you could ever catch me? A beach with a gimlet is where I'll be!" , Walter's the killer and he's run away! ''Amy (holding her fist, angrily): ''You're right! He says "A beach with a gimlet"! He's running off to the sunshine! ''Amy (pumping her fist): ''Good idea! Maybe there's still time to catch him at the airport! 'At the airport...' ''Amy (holding her gun): ''Freeze! Put your hands up, Walter! ''Walter (dressed in a coat and smoking a cigarette, shocked): ''Um, . What's going on? I was just off for a brief vacation... to get over my grief. ''Amy (puts away her gun, angrily): ''We know you killed Lindsay, Walter. found your sweat on Lindsay's shoe and your cigarette ash on her glove! ''Walter (sweating, nervously): ''There must be some mistake! Why would I- ''Amy (disgusted): ''Stop pretending! There's a filmstrip showing you murdering Lindsay! Why did you do it? She was just a young woman with real problems that- ''Walter (shouting): ''Oh, she had problems, and boy did I hear about them! My step-mother this! My boyfriend that! She'd cry on my shoulder so much my shirt got worn through! ''Walter: ''It's horrible being a hotel bartender! Every night these rich, miserable people come moan about their problems! What about my problems?! ''Walter (doing evil gestures): ''So, one day I had this plan. I told Lindsay I'd help her escape from Ivywood... to start a new life! ''Walter: ''Lindsay trusted me so much! I persuaded her to give me her money and valuables to look after! ''Walter (angrily): ''After I had all her money, I told her to meet me on the film set, where I'd help her run away. and I did help her... in a way. ''Walter (doing evil gestures): ''Then part two of my brilliant plan: since Lindsay told me about everyone who hated her, I knew everything I needed to frame all of them! ''Walter (happily): ''Since Dick Shakespeare had dumped Lindsay, the film set where Dick worked would make the perfect crime scene! ''Walter: ''I put that death warrant on the boardwalk to lead you straight to Hubert Bannister, Lindsay's uncaring father! ''Walter (nervously): ''Maybe I got carried away when I customized that fortune teller. But I wanted you to suspect Rico Damascus! He hated Lindsay! ''Walter (tearing up): ''I even made that anonymous call, to make sure you found the clues I left... I almost pulled it off... Until you found me. ''Amy: ''Walter, you've played a clever game with us! But was cleverer! You're under arrest for the murder of Lindsay Bannister! ''Honorable Dante (pointing a finger): ''You there. You're a bartender, right? ''Walter (back in his bartender uniform, sweating): ''Yes, sir. ''Honorable Dante (happily): ''Then I'll take a double whiskey and a bag of peanuts. ''Amy (nervously): ''Err... Judge Dante, this man is on trial for murder. ''Honorable Dante: ''Oh, of course. You're that bartender that murdered that socialite, Lindsay Bannister! ''Honorable Dante (excitedly): ''I love talking to bartenders! You're all so understanding. Let me tell you my troubles, you see- ''Walter (shouting): ''No way! I can handle anything but being another shoulder to cry on! ''Honorable Dante: ''Fine, if you don't want to talk to me... This Court sentences you to ten years in prison! ''Amy (smiling): '', congratulations! You did a great job solving this twisting puzzle of a murder! ''Amy (smirking): ''But have you seen Frank? He helped you more than I did, I thought he'd be at the trial! ''Amy: ''Oh, you're right. He must have found out that Velma doesn't really love him. Poor Frank, I wonder where he is... 'In a bar somewhere...' ''Frank (in black and white): ''Of all the police stations in the world, she had to walk into mine! ''Frank: ''What's a cop gonna do? My dame dumped me. I left my job... I need to get my act together. ''Frank (grinning): ''Hey, bartender, can I get another drink?... Anything but a gimlet! '''THE END' Ivywood Confidential 4 PREVIOUSLY ON CRIMINAL CASE... Frank Knight: ''I can't believe it, Russell. Were you really raised in the Utopian cult? ''Russell (sadly): ''Sadly, yes. The Utopians discourage their own members to question their actions. You must never pry, never doubt their orders. I hated that... ''Russell (biting his glasses): ''But it sounds like brainwashing, doesn't it? That's why I know the Utopians are behind Gaston's brainwashing, ! ''Russell (puts glasses away): ''And I'll prove it, ! Just you wait! 'BACK TO THE PRESENT...' ''Russell: '', I know I seem obsessive, but this brainwashing thing is bothering me... Would you be ready to help? ''Chief Marquez (scratching her head): ''That'll have to wait. The personnel at the hotel called us, concerned that Dick Shakespeare's been acting strange. I would like you and to check it out. ''Chief Marquez (hands on her hips, skeptically): ''And that's not all, a rare diamond has been reported, but so far, we have no potential suspects in mind... ''Frank: ''You're right, , Rico Damascus is some kind of antiques enthusiast, and the guy's a bit shady, maybe he's involved... ''Chief Marquez (angrily): ''Frank, you're back? I thought you had resigned? Did your love stor- ''Frank (sweating, amused): ''Haha, Andrea, that was just a... misunderstanding. Of course I'm back! Couldn't leave all alone now, could I?! ''Chief Marquez (skeptically): ''If you say so. , the diamond was last seen at the boardwalk, but don't forget to check on Dick Shakespeare with Russell, please. 'See what's up with Dick.' ''Russell (skeptically): ''Dick Shakespeare, the hotel called and said they were worried about your behavio- ''Dick (brainwashed): ''I'm cured! I have seen the truth, they showed me the path! ''Russell (shocked): ''Oh, no, not again! You're right, , Dick's been brainwashed! This is exactly what happened to Gaston Dumas! ''Russell: ''Dick, who brainwashed you?! It was the Utopians, wasn't it?! ''Dick: ''I'm cured! I have seen the truth! ''Russell (sadly): ''I agree, we won't get anything out of Dick: his mind is fried! ''Russell (angrily): ''I'm still convinced the Utopians are behind this... all we need is some proof! Good idea, , let's have a look around! 'Investigate Hotel Lobby.' ''Russell: ''You think this is Dick Shakespeare's briefcase, ? Excellent idea, people's belongings can tell us a lot, let's have a look inside! 'Examine Dick's Briefcase.' ''Russell (impressed): ''Nicely done, , you found a journal in Dick Shakespeare's briefcase! Let's take a look at his literary skills... ''Russell (biting his glasses): ''"Gotta be careful, Hubert knows I know..." You think he's talking about a certain Hubert Bannister, ? ''Russell (puts glasses away, remembering in shock): ''Wait a second, I know him! Hubert Bannister is an important member of the Utopians! I've always hated him! ''Russell: ''Quick, can you recover the second page of Dick's journal, ?! We need to know what else was written about Hubert! 'Examine Faded Journal.' ''Russell (impressed): ''Excellent work recovering the faded text, ! Now let's see what else Dick Shakespeare wrote in his journal... ''Russell: ''"Gotta be careful, Hubert knows I know Utopians are brainwashing people." ''Russell (excitedly): ''Ha, we were right, ! The Utopians are the ones who brainwashed Dick Shakespeare and Gaston Dumas! We've got them now! ''Russell: ''I know, this isn't sufficient proof to arrest all the Utopians... But it's enough to question Hubert! 'Confront Hubert about the Utopians' brainwashing.' ''Russell (skeptically): ''Hubert Bannister, found the secret you wanted to stop your daughter from revealing... ''Hubert (in a wheelchair, holding a cigar): ''What "secret" is this? ''Russell (angrily): ''Like your daughter, Dick Shakespeare realized the Utopians are brainwashing people... And then you crazy monsters brainwashed him! ''Hubert (smoking his cigar): ''You'll be hard pressed to prove such a ridiculous claim! How would we control people's minds exactly? ''Russell: ''We know you and the Utopians are behind this thought control mascarade, and be sure will prove it soon enough! ''Hubert (shouting): ''You don't know what you're getting into... The Utopians are too powerful for you, detectives! ''Russell (angrily): ''Don't be too sure, Bannister! ''Hubert (smoking his cigar): ''Lindsay disappointed me like you disappointed your father, Russell. You should never have left the Utopians. It's too late now to be saved! ''Hubert (holding his cigar, grinning): ''But since you're here, make yourselves useful and take away Lindsay's clothes, will you? She always had terrible taste, right down to her garments. 'Investigate Boardwalk.' '(Before investigating Boardwalk)' ''Frank: '', no trace of a diamond... this investigation's turning into a pain in... Wait, someone's coming... ''Ramirez (excitedly): '' ! So glad to see you! What brings you here? ''Frank: ''None of your business, buddy... What brings YOU here? ''Ramirez: ''I've been hired to investigate relics and antiques trafficking in Pacific Bay, and I've got a very big lead! ''Ramirez (shocked): ''I even took a picture of someone carrying a huge diamond, it looked nearly priceless... ''Ramirez (sweating, nervously): ''But I was so excited when I saw you here... I might have lost it on the way. It should be around here! Please, could you help me find it? ''Frank: ''Yeah, you're right, , maybe it's related to the stolen diamond Andrea told us about. Let's find this picture, then! '(After investigating Boardwalk)' ''Frank: ''Yeah, , this torn picture could be the one your silly friend lost. If you say you can fix it... let's do this! 'Examine Torn Picture.' ''Frank (shocked): ''Well, "super detective" Ramirez wasn't kidding when he said it was a big diamond on his picture... It could be the stolen one! ''Ramirez (excitedly): ''You found my picture, ! Thanks a lot! So, it's key evidence, right? ''Frank (smoking a cigarette): ''Well, it'd be better to identify the man carrying the diamond, don't you think? ''Frank (puts cigarette away): ''Good idea. , let's send the picture to Hannah, she'll make do with your friend's poor photography skills... 'Analyze Restored Picture.' ''Hannah: ''Okay guys, I managed to brighten up the picture enough to identify your man. You met the thief before... it's Rico Damascus. ''Ramirez (excitedly): ''Yes! My investigation will lead to an arrest! That's quite an achievement in my career as a private detective, ! ''Frank (winking): ''Yeah, well... Without , you'd still be looking for your picture... But let's go talk to Rico! 'Question Rico about the stolen diamond.' ''Ramirez: ''Mr Damascus, we have proof you were recently in possession of a stolen diamond, that picture I took says it all! ''Ramirez (excitedly): ''Haha! That's right, caught in the act, you are in big trouble! ''Rico (with a cat on his shoulder and holding a walking stick, grinning): ''This is supposed to be a picture of me? ''Frank (grinning): ''Listen, our lab proved it was you carrying the diamond... Now, you can try and fight it, but it's key evidence, denying will only make it worse! ''Rico (sweating, shocked): ''This is unfortunate... I don't have the diamond anymore. It was a special order, I took risks... What a fool I was to give in to a lady's charm... ''Frank: ''A lady? Who's this lady you gave the diamond to? ''Rico: ''I don't disclose my customers' names to anyone... But you may get lucky if you go to the movie set... ''Frank (shouting): ''Don't think you're off the hook here! You confessed to trafficking and selling a diamond worth millions... Rico Damascus, you're under arrest! ''Frank: ''And , shall we go to the movie set? I don't trust that slime-ball, but if it means finding this diamond... Let's go, but let's grab something to eat first! 'Investigate Movie Set.' ''Frank (shocked): ''Wait, does this purse belong to Velma? ... Do you think she could have the diamond?! If it's her... ''Frank: ''Yeah, , let's have a look inside! 'Examine Velma's Purse.' ''Frank (shouting): ''Unbelievable, ... Velma bought the stolen diamond! Yeah, let's go talk to her, she won't make a fool of me twice! 'Confront Velma about the stolen diamond.' ''Frank: ''Velma, 's here to discuss the diamond we found in your purse... ''Velma (holding her cigarette): ''It's a lovely diamond, isn't it, just like you, Frank... ''Frank (shouting): ''Cut it out, you won't fool me again! Rico Damascus is locked up already, and you're following him! ''Velma (blowing a kiss): ''That's right, he took risks to steal this diamond for me, all it took was a smile... just like with you, Frank! ''Velma (angrily): ''And don't be so sure about putting me behind bars, I know very powerful people, and my husband won't tolerate me spending a second in prison. ''Frank (shouting): ''Too bad, you're going to jail! You even tried to corrupt me with this whole seduction game, we'll find a way to make that a fine, I'm sure! 'Later, at the station...''' ''Frank: '', I'm glad you helped me arrest Velma... She got what she deserved for playing with my feelings! ''Russell (in disbelief): ''Well, sorry to be a killjoy here, but I saw her leaving the station... She was released on bail, probably paid by her husband... ''Russell: ''Her husband who's probably responsible for turning Dick Shakespeare into a servile vegetable for his beloved cult! ''Frank (confused): ''"Servile vegetable"... What do you mean? ''Russell: '' discovered that the Utopians are brainwashing people! Remember that French writer, Gaston Dumas? ''Frank: ''Yeah, the guy you went to arrest for robbery and you found completely... ''Russell: ''Brainwashed, yes! At least now we know the Utopians are behind this... but we need more to arrest them! Category:Criminal Case Category:Transcripts